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Piss Angel

I'm not super into metal. I enjoy dabbling into the genre every once in a while, however I am far from being an expert.

 A good number of years ago I read a review of this band called Pig Destroyer; they had no bassist and played some heavy fucking metal. I checked them out on myspace because the review, and name of the band, intrigued me. The music was good enough, however being that I lean more towards the punk side of the music spectrum I didn't feel the need to add any of their music to my collection. That being said their name has always stuck with me..and whenever I put those words together it brings to mind blackness. I can only assume that their shows have the gnarliest of mosh pits. In my mind it'd be one of those pits that people go into expecting to get hurt. The first few minutes might be awesome but eventually you end up with a bloody nose and dislocated shoulder. It's more of a dick out than a fun time...

This past Friday I had a small bag of Blair's Death Rain Jolokia Pepper cauldron-cooked potato chips. I've had Blair's chips before and remembered them being very spicy (I can't remember what degree of hotness I had previously consumed). I prepared myself, got a glass of water and some sour cream, then sat down and cracked the bag. I'm not terribly fond of extremely spicy foods, I enjoy heat but it has to be accompanied by flavour. The first few chips that I ate were straight from the bag, no sour cream, I wanted to consume them the way that the manufacturer intended. These chips are SPICY but to my surprise they actually had some flavour...before the heat kicked in and began to have it's way with my mouth. For the first few chips I could also actually taste the potato chips which are cooked perfectly. After a few chips, I started to dip them in the sour cream to cut the heat, which was building up exponentially with each chip. The experience wasn't as extreme as I had anticipated, however by the end of the 85g bag I was happy that it was over. Instead of a bleeding nose and dislocated shoulder I walked away with a black eye and sore ribs. 

I personally feel no need to eat these chips on a regular basis, or ever again. At the same time I won't dissuade anyone from trying them, for extreme heat they're pretty good.

If you want a feat of strength feel free to crush a bag, I'll just sit back and offer a cloth to wipe the sweat off of your forehead.

Stay hydrated,
Marc

Comments

  1. Jordy Ramone4 January 2015 at 18:38

    I had Blair's once. They try to market their chips as an extreme experience. Something you try once and never have the desire to do again. Sounds like they are doing this shit again.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Jordy Ramone4 January 2015 at 18:39

    You should review those red hot cheetos. They are like crack to me. I consume as much as possible and am left with mouth sores.

    ReplyDelete

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